Subhashis Das
God was
sleeping; resting actually; fagged out owing to her age, some trillion or
zillion years…or…maybe... alright you morons, she is ageless if you want in
that way.
Enjoying the
light and the heat from the sun she had created trillions of years ago, one
fine morning she fished out her notebook. Flipping over its pages she came to the
page in which she had catalogued her creations. One particular planet drew her
attention.
Earth.
Now lemme
see in which solar system have I placed this sphere, God ruminated. Ah yes it’s
in here. What a fool I am (finally she realises). Wasn’t this planet my crowning glory, my supreme
most one I created? Yes I now recall... putting in it my most beautiful
creation, the humans in it; let’s see how
the humans and the other inhabitants are doing down there.
Well
here’s Jupiter, Mars and yes there; that’s Earth, my dear old blue planet.
Let’s peep in.
Man oh man! It’s
blue alright but I did not create this planet in this manner. Had I created
this planet or was this done by that abysmal son of a “b…” Satan? My my… why are
there so many humans around…are those tall eye sores their dwellings? Darn!
Where have most of my animals, birds and fish that I had created, gone?
Look at the rivers, lakes, oceans and
mountains, I created eons ago? They are so grubby and filthy. Where are the forests which I had crammed
this sphere with?
God let out
a deep sigh of soreness …aagh! I can’t even breathe this air that I had once created.
Oh God (dash it that’s me)! the air is contaminated.
Who
devastated my darling blue planet? Lemme
see. God shut her eyes and images of humans hovered in front of her.
Why…it’s
these “God blessed”… (But that’s me. Alright cut the God out from it)…okay… so
its these “blessed humans” who have been polluting my waters here, deforesting
all my forests and what have you. They are also killing and eating up all of my
animals, reptiles and fish for their tang and pushing them to extinction. Tch
tch what a mess my people have made here.
They donot
seem to know me who on "earth" I am. They believe that this planet is theirs and
therefore they could do whatever they wish to with it...huh? They do not seem
to know that I am the boss around.
Alright they
need to be punished for their greed and lust. I shall have to do something that
would do justice for my wounded darling blue planet and in the process fix her.
I need to clean the air, the waters, and the ruined mountains. I shall have to let
the trees flourish here without much restraint and even let my animals, birds and
fish multiply in joy for which I need to teach these humans a lesson. I need to
set this planet right.
They ought
to be punished for their act. No?
I mean this
punishment should be in the form of a therapy. Therapeutic punishment; how
about that? Well then to begin with, how about sending down some bacteria to harm
them?
Mmm…the
brains I have planted inside these humans are smart; I have already tried to
reform them by sending down bacteria but they have invented medicines to kill
it. So I shall have to try something else…
Lemme see…what
if I send down some virus...well, they had curbed on the earlier ones I had
send down. Virus seems to be good idea...but this time it better be a tougher
one. Hah ha! A tougher one then. Tough
virus, as a justice; so it be then...
I know these
humans would pop in a name for it… say…mmm…Corona...Corona Virus may be… But
many would die of it as per the decree I created for life …well humans will
invent medicines for this too… but it will take them time.
In the
meantime my beautiful planet will revive when all the humans will remain locked
in their abodes. I shall clean up the air, the waters, and the lands. I would
have the animals grow along with the woods. My Earth will become beautiful once
again.
But would
humans learn to respect me and my creations even after such a large devastation
of their lives? Hmm... I don’t think so. These human beings I created as my
finest creation are real nitwits. Well let them suffer for a while as I rest...
“Secretary,”
yelled God. “Get somebody to clean up my bed cover. These humans are lethargic;
they do not even change in paradise.
Aagh! This God damned, sorry damned back ache...
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